Dear annoying Bostonians,

Just in case you've forgotten, we are in America.

In America, we walk on the right side of the street.

The right side of the escalator is for standing; the left side is for walking.

Before you shove your way onto the train, you should let the people who need to exit the train... exit the train.

Also, boys, please open the door for girls. Or at least hold it until she gets to the door instead of pretending not to see her.

Unless you have a physical ailment, please stop taking the elevator from the first floor to the second floor. You're wasting space, oxygen, and everyone else's time.

If you're going to drive 50 on the freeway, please get out of the fast lane.

And finally, when a car is speeding along at 40 miles per hour through a green light, your pedestrian rights don't matter. Get off the street and back onto the sidewalk until the white man says it's safe.

k, thanks.

my favorite thing in the world, currently.

tackiest. thing. ever.

Today, on my lovely stroll around Copley Square, I stumbled upon this abomination:




This Dunkin' Donuts was recently renovated and is now sporting some tacky, God-awful, cheap-looking, plastic door handles. If it were not for my acute addiction to caffeine, I would've made it a point to stay far, far away.

Superstar Status.

This morning, in the daily morning rush to get out of the house on time, I stubbed my toe. On the fireplace. The fireplace is brick, and it hurt. But my mom was yelling at me to hurry up, so I threw on a pair of shoes (and by threw on, I mean lovingly unlaced, put on, and relaced) and ran to the car.

I took off my shoe on the car ride, just to make sure I was OK. That's when I realized I was bleeding, and that the blood had already soaked all the way through my sock.

My first thought?

Just for today, I get to be Curt Schilling.

305.90

In the past 24 hours, I have ingested well over 300mg of caffeine (I mean... definitely more than that). It was a long day, and I've been downing coffee after coffee in a last ditch effort to stay awake. Just so happens that my professor mentioned "Caffeine Intoxication" during lecture today. That's right. It's a diagnosable disorder.

Below, I present to you the Diagnostic Criteria for Caffeine Intoxication (as stated in the DSM-IV). I've highlighted the symptoms I've experienced throughout the day.



This is probably not a good thing.

I am a bad person.

So, today, after dinner, I went to the store with my mom. On the way out, I saw this hideous display of men's neckties. I mean... hideous. First of all, the small round table on which the ties were placed was in complete disarray. Someone had foraged through the ties, and no employee had bothered to reorganize them. As I contemplated exactly how much distress the clutter was causing me, I saw a tie that was particularly outstanding (and I don't mean 'outstanding' in the way that your 5th grade teacher means it when she writes it on your paper next to a foil star sticker). I took a picture with my phone as evidence of its... not-so-tasteful appearance:



The first thought that hit me was "wow, that's an ugly tie." It had slightly uneven stripes all over it (in shades of blue and green) and it honestly looked as if it'd been colored in with magic markers. I continued to frown disapprovingly and the following (slightly harsh) thought crossed my mind:

The only way this tie would ever be worth buying was if some poor cancer-stricken child had designed it and was selling it to raise money.

And then I saw the label.

hello.

I desire to blog, but I have neither the brainpower nor the content to do so. Just letting you know that I am still alive, kind of.

Also, I think the world as a whole is going to be much more productive for the next few hours... because Facebook is down. Yup, I just tried to log on, and I was presented with this message:

Your account is temporarily unavailable due to site maintenance. It should be available again within a few hours. We apologize for the inconvenience.

I wonder how many middle schoolers (and high schoolers and college students, actually) will be emotionally distraught when they return from school only to find that their beloved time-waster is down.

Oh well. Maybe in the next 3 hours, someone will discover the cure for the world's diseases.